Bad News Bears

After having a brief yet meaningful (not that brevity results in less meaning...let's use succinct instead)... after having a SUCCINCT conversation with my younger brother, I was pointed towards the truth. The truth being, "[my] life sucks."

Let's try to keep a positive attitude towards this new revelation. To be fair to my brother, and his state of thinking towards my successes, I was debating whether or not it was worth paying for traffic school seeing as my deadline to finish the course is up in less than a week. Yes, I got a speeding ticket. And yes, I am doing traffic school. How I got that speeding ticket is a story for another time. So it would seem, my life does indeed suck.

My brother then proceeded to inform me that I am the unluckiest person he knows. This I received with less skepticism. I am indeed the unluckiest person I have ever met. It all began in middle school...

As I reminisce about my childhood, I can honestly say I grew up during some very shiny, very golden, years. It was a time of after-school programs, monthly plays and musicals, hoe-downs...well, to put it simply, schools had money, my parents had money, life was good. At least this is how I choose to see the decision my parents made to put my brother and I in some after school program for hours at a time where we were rewarded by our good behavior. I don't remember ANYTHING about the program, except that we received golden stars for good behavior, and at the end of the week, we would enter our stars into a drawing for a chance to win all sorts of cool things.

The first couple of weeks I would gather up my stars, meticulously write my name on the back (as to make sure it was legible, I didn't want to get cheated) and entered them in the drawing. Did I mention I was a saint child? Needless to say, I never won anything. My brother, however, won something every week. Thanks to my brother's lucky streak, I finally got to go to Knott's Berry Farm. The last and final week of our after school program, I got smart. I took all my stars, wrote my brother's name on them, and told him that anything we won, we would go splitsies.

Now, obviously I was an unlucky child, as I had never won anything up until that point in my life; and this experience in particular made matters worse. I will never know why my brother's one, occasionally two, star submission would defy the laws of probability. Anyway, we won. A set of THE COOLEST Buzz Lightyear walkie-talkies, which we used everyday, ALL DAY. I've never seen any walkie-talkies match the awesomeness of these, and probably never will.

In conclusion, it's okay if I'm the unluckiest person in the world, that's what I have my brother for.